meanwhile

meanwhile
life went on as if
there was nothing missing.
the sound of sea i had
carefully captured
one solemn night
and preserved
in an air tight box
had gotten lost somehow.
i kept pretending
that the way i appeared now
was how i had always been.
meanwhile
the things i tried to stash
kept getting lost.
i refused to look for seepage
or accomplices to guard over me.
but i could never
remain unencumbered.